Thursday, July 11, 2013

Friendship Guide

The following guide is offered to help in building relationships with others where we can have the opportunity to share the good news of Jesus Christ.  Developing relationships takes an effort that should be motivated by the love of Jesus for us and others.  The guide provides some helpful thoughts that may help in building relationships.



Friendship Guide

 

1.  Identify what people would say about the relationship with you have with someone.  Why would they say this?

 

2.  How have you been a friend to others?  Take time to list ways you have      shown friendship:

 

            3.  How can you become a better friend?

            Consider:

·         Could you learn to “be a good listener”?

 

·         Could you consider joining him/her in some activities, but being careful not to compromise your faith?  Examples of activities might be sharing your hobbies, or personal interests, or just being ready to offer help in projects they are doing.  Be careful not to talk too much about yourself.   Take time to take an interest in him/her!  Here is a guide that we will call a friendship guide

 

4.  What are some possible common interests between you and the other person? Take time to review the following list of ideas to help build friendships.  Consider:

·         Their likes

·         Their dislikes

·         Their hobbies

·         Their goals

·         Their dreams

·         Their fears

·         Their hurts

·         Their joys

·         Their struggles

·         Common Interests

 

5.  Are you willing to be vulnerable and share your personal responses or feelings and opinions?  To be free to do so will open yourself to being vulnerable.  In some cases, if you are not willing to listen to different opinions it could hinder building a relationship.  However, if you are willing to listen, that can be a form of being humble which lets people know you are a real person.

           

 6.  Can you “be sensitive” to them in your approach, avoiding judgment?

 

7.  Can you “be faithful” to follow-up, being true to your word and commitments?

 

8.  Are you willing to take time and not rush a friendship?  It may take several years.

 

             9.  Are you willing to find ways to encourage them?

 

           10.  Will you avoid gossip at all times?

 

Further notes on developing relationships:

  • Relationships are built over time
  • Do not jump to a spiritual encounter, prematurely-Ask the Lord to guide you.
  • Ask them if they would appreciate your to praying for them, and if they would allow you to follow-up on your prayer for them.  If there has been an answer to prayer, they would probably be eager to share what has happened. 
  • Consider taking reasonable prayer requests to the Lord, for them.  ---Unreasonable requests sometimes come up.  Don’t pray for unscriptural ones—when such a request occurs, consider asking the Lord how to discern and pray for the real need.
  • Remember, it is important that we allow the Spirit of God to work in the other person.
  •  Developing friendships involves listening to the Lord and His Holy Spirit
  • Allow the Holy Spirit to work, as you pray for God’s wisdom and direction.
  • The Lord can provide others who will pray for us, and who will also keep us accountable in developing relationships.
  • As a relationship develops, the Lord will show you how you can find ways to minister to his/her spiritual needs.  The Lord can also help you to encourage them to meet other Christians in events they enjoy.

 

Finally, as the Holy Spirit of God works in a person’s heart, be responsive to his/her requests.

  • Answer questions clearly and compassionately
  • Encourage and introduce them to other Christians
  • Be clear when presenting the Gospel

 

An important concept to remember from this lesson is that joining together in prayer for others provides the opportunity to bring God’s help to them—giving the opportunity to develop relationships with others, and also helps in building relationships with people who are not a part of the group, who may not know the Lord.  It also gives the opportunity to share Jesus with others.

 

Reflections:

  

The reflection exercise for this lesson is an exercise of what we have learned to-date in the course.  It is intended to encourage you to practice some of the principles we have learned which relate to prayer and building relationship.  It is possible that not everyone may be able to bring a group together to pray.  If that is so and there is a group already praying, consider joining that group, then answers some of the questions in the reflection.   

  

The exercise is a practicum to bring people together in prayer and observe how they respond to group praying.  It may take some time to pull your observations together about praying together.  Your observations should relate back to what we have learned.  Those of you who are pastors and are a part of the class, it would be good to hear from your point of view.  Those who are not pastors, your reflective comments are also very important.  To help lay-students get started, perhaps they could ask their pastor if he/she would welcome your bringing people together for a prayer group.  If they do, that too is an excellent opportunity to learn and observe.  Sharing those observations with others on Pray.Network, could encourage someone else in the class. Maybe you will observe some other issues about prayer in a group that you would like to share for discussion – that too would be helpful.

 

Here are some possible ways to bring people together for prayer—consider praying for an event that your church is having, for example: Vacation Bible School, or a special function event, or a church activity. --that would help us grow in praying together.

 

With the help of God’s Holy Spirit, both pastors and lay students in the course, together, can offer their reflections and comments to the class  for discussion.  Doing this, would benefit all in the course, and it will help us have a deeper understanding of praying together.   During the exercise, we will continue with our lessons, covering the following: praying in groups; prayer circles; looking at the power of a praying church; and developing a prayer-culture in the church. 

 

If you are actually able to do this exercise, in one form or another, I pray that the Lord will make it a meaningful exercise.  For those who cannot do the exercise, please work on the reflections below, and draw from you past experiences in answering.

 

Exercise Reflection: 

  • How can we encourage prayer to move from inward self-focus to outward focus on others, but not forgetting the inward-personal need?
  • What have you observed about the action of prayer helping to build relationships?
  • If you could identify critical elements in “encouraging prayer with others”, what are they?  Why do you think they are important?
  • Ask your prayer group to discuss what factors they consider important that encourages others “to belong” to a prayer group.  -- Have the elements they have identified helped them to reach out to others, who are not in their prayer group? 

You may have other observations--please feel free to share them.  When your project is complete, please share about it on pray.

 

SHARE IT -- WHILE IT IS FRESH!

   

If you have any questions, please ask!




©2014 Lewis Turner

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